Navan RC Planet X Series 2016 Round 1: Blackwater Park

90 riders on the B Race grid. Courtesy of Navan Camera Club

In a week where some experienced Yogi Bear and Park Ranger Smith adventures, and Mayo went back to being the Shadowy Place that Mufasa told Simba never to go,  I went for a spin in the mountains and had medium salsa on my burrito with the aim of dropping some weight.

The course covered an area of wasteland between the river and a football pitch, with some tree-rooty single track sections. They had used a JCB to create the obstacles; a Bomb Hole, a high step up and some large mounds. The ground was really firm, even the previous two days of rain could not soften it. This meant that the parcours was bumpier than my face after a Pizza, Pesto and Pringles binge. I reckon that for the next two runnings of Navan’s CX series, it will be softer.

I arrived, signed on and prepared for some practise laps. I would’ve completely missed the first barrier only for Michael standing there. The barrier was grey and the path behind it was also grey. I only got two practice laps in. The reason for this was the time consuming process of me trying to build up the courage to ride the drop off. After my crash and subsequent concussion, I cannot mentally bring myself to take a risk again. I’m not a Johny Sexton wannabe. Philly demanded that I try to ride it. Paul Kane zipped by me, shouting “No Brakes Luke”, and bunny-hopped down it. Ralph Waldo Emerson’s quote “Do the thing and you will have the power” was not the first thing that came to my mind as I watched the ground disappear. This would be a similar situation to Tymon Park last year. I would jump down the drop each lap.

Barry putting his MTB skills to use. Courtesy of Paul and Sinéad

I went back to the car to discover that I had 20 mins before the start. It took me 10 mins to get ready. I was on the third row of a wide grid, there was 90 riders starting the combined B race. Women, Children and Men of the caliber of Billy Zane would be making a Titanic dash the length of the football field.

We held a minute’s silence for Richie Byrne. It took some auld lads 15 seconds to realise that this was quite time.

The whistle blew, pedals engaged, breaths were drawn, tyres bit. 90 riders sprinted to the first 90 degree corner. I was going backwards. A fitting football analogy for this would be, Colin Hendry and Gazza in Euro 96. Everyone was held up by a guy unable to ride the first ramp. After a quick dismount, long run and a remount, I was behind a rider from Cuchullain CC. I thought to myself, “this guy has the Bike Station League to practice so he should be confident”. I presumed wrong. He didn’t ride the clay mound, couldn’t remount a top it. I was right up his chuff, I was boxed in. Same thing happened on the sandy mound. He was slightly faster than me on the flat. So he cleared the boards and was onto the single track in front of me. Luckily he completely messed up the log in the forest, softly crashed, dropped his chain. I dropped the hammer and caught up to my next quarry. It was a young lady from Bray. She had similar remounting speed on the next boards and step up.

The drop off... it looked way scarier on the day. Courtesy of Paul and Sinéad 

As I approached the drop off, I dismounted and ran down the drop. I heard another rider shouting at me to get off her line. I had enough of a gap to not interfere with her. She got a gap on me with her speed from riding the drop. I passed both her and the Bray rider on the first part of the football pitch. I apologised for almost cutting her off, she accepted, we got on with our races. It’s always a good idea to apologise when you’re in the wrong, least Johnny Lawrence try to seek retribution in the carpark and you need to wax cars and paint fences for your neighbour Mr. Miyagi.

I had a minor tussle with Breda. By “minor tussle”, I mean she passed me and remained in my field of view for 45 seconds. Elsewhere Barry Keogh and Dave had a tussle. By “tussle”, I mean Barry was playing footsie with Dave’s wheel. They did this until they emulated WVA and MVDP at the 2016 Worlds and Dave withdrew.

The rest of the race followed the pattern of last week. The faster riders, who got bad starts passing me. Other riders who passed me included the even faster guys who got great starts… although they were lapping me. Unlike last week, at no point did I want to give up. Although my back was again not coping well with the firm ground.

I could hear the commentary about the charge the Ryan twins were on. I knew they were coming up to lap me. I kept one eye behind, as to not impede Kanturk’s next crop. Knowing that the path ahead was only wide enough for one rider, I pulled over and stopped before it. This allowed the youngsters to pass. I also afforded the same passage to the pursuing Woggles.

There was a guy in a Rabbit costume handing out glasses of beer. I abstained until I started getting lapped. At this point, on the second last lap, I stopped to have a beer. It really took the edge off the tough day. Karl from Tiernan's stopped off too. The beer gave him super-powers. Me less so. It was not sitting well inside my abdomen. The next time I passed my Rabbit costumed enabler, I refused his kind offer.

Mike attended the AA-GM on Monday. Courtesy of Navan Camera Club

Mike had a great race. He was on the grid, only to realise that he left something in the car. He left and came back to the grid. He started from the back and made his way up 16th place, 3 seconds behind 15th. I was expressly courteous to Mike when he came up to lap me on the Singletrack. One might even say… I went out of my way to help him.

Had the race been a lap longer, Paul Kane would’ve also lapped me. Michelle started on the front row and had a strong performance, finishing second in the Women’s category. Barry, after eliminating Dave, kept pushing and finished just behind Michelle. Breda continued her strong work from the previous race again finishing third. I would finish in the dream position of 69. No CycloCross race results would be complete without at least one person’s name being wrong. This week the honor went to Dave.

Michelle making it look easy. Courtesy of Navan Camera Club

After the race, I freshened up via tried and trusted method, towel and deodorant. I got chatting to the guy from the Giant team beside me. I was all packed up and ready to watch the start of the A race when Ronan rushes up looking for a Multi-Tool. I choose that moment to do my one good deed of the week.

I looked sad as I waited in the queue for the €2 coffee and bun. Dave told me to cheer up. Dave did not understand the gravity of the situation. There was a lot of people in front of me, and what looked to be only one tray of buns. I got the second last bun, it tasted really nice. The coffee was great quality too. It rivaled the Fixx coffee and wiped the floor with the guy, pushing Instant Kenco, at the Leinster Champs.

Unfortunately Orwell’s wheel problems didn’t end with Dave. Ronan rolled a Tubular and was too far away from his spare wheel in the pits. Tom burped a Tubeless tyre.

There was some exciting battles in the A race. David Conroy and Glenn Kinning were providing the excitement up front. David got a massive gap early. Glenn reeled him in and had a gap of 20 seconds on him going into the last lap. Glenn dropped his chain, David capitalised for the victory.

Eric making hay. Courtesy of Navan Camera Club

We cheered Philippe each time round. The real Orwell action centred on Eric and Eoin. Eric was in pursuit of the rider ahead of him. Behind, Eoin was holding the gap at 20 seconds. Alas Eoin could not keep in touch with Eric as the pace increased on the last lap. A solid 8th and 9th for the lads. With Eric 2 seconds off 7th place. Philippe held a 7 second advantage to score 22nd place.

Former Triathlete, Bryan Keane lost concentration after he finished the race and hit a bump, sending him over the handlebars.

Navan put on a really great event. There was even post-race food. It was chicken curry, although I only had the rice and curry sauce.

The low point of the day came on my way home. I decided to stop at the shop to pick up water. I made the executive decision to try a Vit-Hit drink, the green one... It was tough going. I cleaned the bike as is tradition. I lay on the floor for a while to align my spine.

Michelle and Breda on the podium. Courtesy of Navan Camera Club

Orwell Results

Women

Pos Name      Time
 1  SILVIA    51:59  GRAVITY BC Five Laps
 2  MICHELLE  54:57 
 3  BREDA     49:34  Four Laps

Men B

Pos Name     Time
 1  WILL RYAN  46:34  O'Leary Stone Kanturk Five Laps
16  MICHAEL    51:26
21  PAUL       52:41
35  MICHELLE   54:57
36  BARRY K    54:59
56  BREDA      49:34  Four Laps
69  LUKE(ME)   53:05

84  DAVE       10:48  Two Laps

Men A

Pos Name      Time
 1  DAVID       59:51  EUROCYCLES Eight Laps
 8  ERIC      1:05:05
 9  EOIN      1:05:48
22  PHILIPPE  1:08:30 Seven Laps
27  TOM B       26:17 Four Laps
29  RONAN       09:04 One Lap

Full Results are available from Navan Round 1: Overall.